Hi! Thanks for stopping by my tumblr. My name is Caitlin, or Catie, whichever you’d like to call me! I’m a 30 year old woman trying to navigate through adulthood and mostly stumbling around because I have no idea what I’m doing. In January ‘15, I moved away from friends and family in Maryland to be with the guy I love, in the midwest! I now live outside of Kansas City, Kansas. This blog is mostly to document my weight loss and my efforts to live a healthy life. It’s also a personal blog too. I’ve struggled with my weight for most of my life. I was overweight by the time I was 8 years old. I went on my first “diet” at age 12 and finally fit into jeans like all the other girls for the first time ever. In high school, I was still overweight but it didn’t rule my life quite yet. I was too busy being a typical teenager. After high school, I hit rock bottom because I struggled to transition from being a kid to suddenly being a young adult. I failed at life, miserably. I was extremely depressed, suicidal, drinking and doing drugs. At one point, I was even arrested. I pulled out of school because I couldn’t handle anything. I went to the doctor to get recommended to see a Psychiatrist and they weighed me. I remember the day exactly: December 18th, 2005. On that day, I found out I weighed 180 lbs. I was completely devastated. I made up my mind to stop eating. Just like that. Who even does that? It makes me so sad now. I was in so much pain. I basically never left my house for 6+ months and would lie to my parents about how much I was eating. I starved myself, would exercise for hours a day, and lost a good 50 lbs. I got down to my lowest weight ever which was 133 lbs. Eventually, I met a guy who made me feel better and made me feel guilty for not eating. So I ate. And ate and ate and ate. I gained all of my weight back, and then some. I struggled for 5+ years with this weight and never really managed to get rid of it. My highest weight ended up being 240 lbs. I have tried everything. Diet pills, prescription and over the counter. Weight Watchers. Nutrisystem. Macro counting. Lifting weights. Exercise DVD’s and videos on YouTube. Nutrition plans. You name it, I have probably tried it to lose weight. None of these things ever gave me lasting results. Some of them hardly gave me any results. For the last two years, I’ve struggled with losing 5-10 lbs, and then gaining them back, losing them again, and gaining them back, etc. Over and over and over again. I started a great program called TSFL September of 2015. I actually managed to lose quite a bit of weight on this program, and finally dropped below 200 lbs. I had not done that in YEARS. However, as soon as I fell off program, I struggled to get back on it. I haven’t managed to get back to that lifestyle for over a year now, and I’ve gained back whatever weight I lost, and some extra. So I’m going back to the basics and just trying to live healthy… this is my never ending journey!